When I made this site, I wanted to make something different. As someone who has struggled physically and mentally in the past I wanted to create somewhere I could properly connect with you all and tell you my story properly, to show how much fitness can help. Whether you decide to take on my services or not I hope you find some inspiration from this page and just know there are no limitations in life. With some hard work and consistency you can change your life around in no time.
I was never the popular kid growing up. I hated school and at 16 years old I finished with no clue what I wanted to do in life. I had no friends, no confidence, no self esteem and was skin and bone weighing around 50kg at 5'11. I was thrown out of school into the first covid lockdown with absolutely nothing going for me, I was depressed and anxious to the point I couldn't sleep.
After a year doing a pointless college course in Manchester, I couldn't take it anymore. I knew I was heading nowhere and something had to change. So at 17 years old I made a leap and decided to pack my bags and move to Gloucester to go to Hartpury College. One of the best ranked sports colleges in the country. By some miracle I had got in, words cant describe the feeling of opening that letter, it was my last hope.
I entered that college shy and unconfident and it was tough. I was surrounded by big, confident athletes (mainly rugby players) but I wasn't going to let that intimidate me. I was going to join them. I started going to the gym, I force fed and drank mass gainer protein shakes every day. But it wasn't easy. It got lonely being away from home and my anxiety was through the roof. For the first year I had times I physically couldn't eat, my head would go fuzzy and my body was completely overwhelmed by nerves and it attacked me however it could. If I was in a large social setting I would have to sneak off to be sick. But over time, forcing myself out of my comfort zone, this soon began to fade. Id finally made some friends and found myself having somewhat of a life and this kept me going. I could see I was improving. All I had to do was keep going.
My second year came around and people started noticing the change in me. After a year in the gym I was a bit bigger and more confident. My anxiety was improving a lot and I began to gradually become more and more confident. The year flew by and I finished going off on a work placement as a water sports instructor down near Bournemouth. This further improved my confidence and gave me a sense of purpose. Who would of thought I could be leading groups of 12+ people on my own when I used to have to run off and be sick if I was in a group that size.
My next step was University. I packed my bags again and headed up to Newcastle for a new chapter. My anxiety had cleared up by now and I had made decent progress in the gym. I was weighing in at around 65kg, 15kg up from when I started. I carried on with my fitness, but University began to take its toll on me. I was sucked into the drinking culture going out every single night and ruining my progress in the gym. I made many stupid decisions, had no job, and ended the year spending just about every penny I had. My demons were coming back.
Second year came around and after working the summer in a summer camp in America I'd got my sense of purpose back. I joined the University athletics club and hit the gym hard. That year I competed for the University in the 1500m and at BUCS cross country. It was always a dream of mine to be part of a sports club and I had done it. Id crushed my demons and took it to the next step by signing up for my first boxing fight. I took it seriously and did 3 months sober of intense training, running and sparring. Unfortunately I had to pull out of the fight due to an injury but I was still proud of myself for going through hell. Stepping in that ring and sparring every week takes guts and id done it. Again looking back at how this all started I couldn't believe id stepped in a boxing ring.
And that takes me up to now, a third year University student. Free of anxiety, in the best shape I've ever been in and now a level 3 qualified PT which takes me onto my next chapter...
I guess the purpose of me telling this story isn't to look for sympathy or anything like that. But just to show how much you can change if you try. Our minds are so powerful but we can only tap into what we are capable of with a strong, healthy body. By pushing ourselves everyday and staying consistent, over time, you can become unrecognisable. If I can do it, anyone can. There will be ups and downs and it wont be easy, but that's what makes it worth it. Nothing worth having comes easily.
I may not be the next big celebrity, I may not be a millionaire but I'm happy with who I am and what I've achieved and now its my turn to help others. Fitness has helped me this whole way through and without it I wouldn't be telling you this story today.
You may even be happy in life and not need to make the changes I did, but why not go one step further? My point is, we are all chained by society to follow the norms and have the ambition sucked out of us, we idolise people on social media but why not idolise yourself? You have the power to be so much more, however you can only do so much alone. I haven't done this journey by myself, I've had help along the way. We all need help.
If you have read this far I hope my story has helped you in one way or another. Feel free to get in touch and if not I hope you go on and win in this game called life.
Lawrence